The sadness that I keep inside
What can I do
What can I say
I can’t keep lying and just be okay
It’s a dark and scary place in my mind
And I miss the hope that I can’t find
I can’t swim anymore
I can’t let it all go
I can’t fake a smile at the door
I’m alone and that’s okay
But it’d be nice if people in my life could stay
Maybe it’s just the cards I’ve been dealt
Or just a twist in life’s belt
All I know is that it hurts
And I feel empty
I just want to be left to my thoughts
Isolated from the bull life brought
I can’t be the strong one anymore
When my whole resolve is crumbling at the core
I’m not happy
But I’m not sad
I’m just indifferent to the bad
Like it doesn’t phase me anymore
That people have so much evil in store
I still haven’t had time to mourn
Mourn my loss of feelings
Mourn for the good days
Mourn for the days when I was at peace
Mourn for the sleep I had
And the food I ate
And the love I gave
But now nowhere is safe
I don’t sleep like I used to
The nightmares find me always
They hunt me down
And use me as their toy
The control they have
The power their given
I’m scared that I can no longer keep it hidden
So if happiness was all a ploy
Then it explains my lack of joy
When is it okay
When is it all good
Will this ever be over
Or will this journey end in nowhere
I want to sleep again
To have a friend
To be able to rest at peace
Instead of terrors keeping me on a leash
Sleep is a need
And so for that I plead
Let me be okay again
And if not then no sleep full send
