Battle for freedom: a song/poem

Though I'm fighting: the battle has not yet come
Though I'm struggling: he shall overcome
I need to learn to let it go
Let my addictions, my habits fall to the floor
There's hope in this moment
A peace that is yet to come
If I just lay it down

I find my freedom in Jesus' name
The only one whom shall remain
Jesus you are, you are my freedom
My battle is not my own
It belongs to him alone

Rest in knowing he is near
Sleeping without a fear
The doubt shall never stay
All burdens be cast away
There is no freedom
Like the one he has for me
I know his plan isn't plain to see
But I know it can set me free

I find my freedom in Jesus' name
The only one whom shall remain
Jesus you are, you are my freedom
My battle is not my own
It belongs to him alone

I lift up my problems
I lift up my habits
In hopes that you can fix them
Mend what is broken
Heal the hatred of what I've spoken
For living in you isn't always easy
My past seeps in all too quickly
But I know that I have to be open
Open to your hands
Open to your demands
To fix my life according to your plans

I find my freedom in Jesus' name
The only one whom shall remain
Jesus you are, you are my freedom
My battle is not my own
It belongs to him alone
To him alone
To him alone
In him alone I find my freedom

The Fight of Hatred

Not sure where this poem/rap/song-ish thing came from, but if we are being honest: it is probably still subconscious thoughts in my brain... So, yea. 

Don't know how to deal with the things on my plate

Got a lot of issues in my brain

At least that's what keeps me awake

Nothing ever seems to be the same

I got one or two people that I can name

Get irritated and they're to blame

Destroy my happy thoughts and create my pain

Now I know I am a mess

Walk around with a smile but still depressed

Make eye contact with them but avoid the rest

Don't have enough patience for that test

Get ticked off wishing they weren't blessed

As selfish as it seems

I am still a human being

Don't got no time for you and me

Can't you see?

I got struggles of my own so let it be

I got no room in this heart for more than me

Wanna take a picture? Pay the fee.

See how I cope with fear?

I lock it up and throw away the key. 

Bottled up its got "no hold on me"

Keep it hidden from the world, 

That they cannot see

I don't mean to disappoint you

Miss the way we used to talk through

All the problems, now I just stew

Got no one now that I go to

Keep it all inside, I should move

Get rid of these negative thoughts, but no can do

Those people that I hate the most

It's like the Christmas' of past ghost

I got an unhealthy dose

Of the bitterness and anger inside of me

I owe them for the lack of sleep

Lay awake counting sheep

Wishing for a happy dream

It seems like that will never be

Hatred is the only thing

Beats death in the fighting ring

Nothing else has the same sting

Three rounds later.. Look who won? 

Ding Ding Ding

Hatred is the only one, remaining

Sheep: BAAAAAHHHH

The great thing about our God is that he is seeking out all of his children and all of his creation. Even though he may have 99 of his Lambs he doesn't care, he is waiting on that one. He wants all of his hundred to be there and he is going out into the darkness where that one is that alone, confused, and searching. He wants the one that no one else did; the one that is so broken that people say that he's too fragile that that lamb doesn't belong with us: he wandered off and it is his problem. We are not to blame for this and we still have 99. But instead Jesus is like that lamb is still mine too, and he knew our name before our parents picked it out; he knit us together in our mother's womb. He called us child even before our Earthly parents did. He knew us. And he waited for us. They are not too far gone for me; this child can still come home. He didn't care that that person had sinned a hundred times he said through me you can be free: free of that sin that you are still paying the cost for, because he took that price tag away as soon as his son came down to dwell with us and in us. He said come to me all who are weary and broken hearted and I will give you rest. I will restore your Brokenness. Because no person is too broken to be healed by me. No person is too far gone. Every lamb is worth saving, because they are still my child and I will love them despite their mistakes, despite their screwed up intentions, and despite wandering off. Because my love is something deeper than materialistic worldly morals. My love is out of place that never runs dry and no matter what you do, you receive that. There's not some application that you fill out, there isn't a guide to a being perfect Christian, and most importantly there isn’t fine print. But there is a path to a true relationship with God: it's called talking. Talking to the one who made you; talking and praying and building that relationship. When you have people in your life, you need to be in constant communication with them, you need to connect with them. It is something you build on it's not something you can just have in an instant and never need it again. And it shouldn’t be a chore to read your bible or pray. It should be an amazing feeling to get to know the father who knew you before you knew yourself, because that's what he wants for us. He wants a relationship, he wants our love because he's already given us his. And nothing you say or do can ever change that. Even if you are that lost sheep, he's not giving up. He finds you and brings you back to the herd. He draws you into the shepherd: whose only intention is to protect you and keep all of his sheep together.